Here in the final blog series for “This Second Chance”. This is the poem at the end of the book:
WATCH
I watch you and wonder:
Do you love her as much as you love yourself
Or do you hate her more than you hate yourself?
Your comforts come first,
Your contempt directed at her and never yourself.
Her purpose in life
Is what she can do for you.
Your purpose is to make her feel
That she is incapable of that.
The better question is:
Why does she keep trying to please you –
Is it out of love, or fear?
Does she hate herself more than you do?
Is she supposed to respect a person, who has no respect for her?
No tenderness
No empathy
No love
No feelings at all
But concern for themselves…
It’s never his fault
And I wonder why she stays.
I see her side of this, too.
I know she sees how other relationships go.
She admires them openly
With a sad smile, when he is not around.
She works
She is strong
She gives all she has.
Maybe he will change if…
If only I…
He is just stressed …
I don’t want to be alone …
No one else would want me …
He needs me.
Underneath, he is a good guy.
Excuses abound
In a vacuum of anger and fear
That feeds the existing darkness
Until it all seems normal.
It isn’t.
Help is not welcomed;
That is, until it is – unless it is too late.
Then comes innocence—a child
The woman protects and nurtures
While he watches her,
Pointing out all she does wrong
Without lifting a finger to ease her burdens.
He is her judge and jury.
He is her reality, and now she feels trapped.
In his web spun of lies and hate
She tries to please,
To create this illusion of family.
It will get better, she thinks; if only …
Maybe another child –
Maybe….
I watch helplessly.
Any comfort is rejected by his influence.
Right now, it’s only words
Which cut into her just like a fist would.
Someday he will cross over from words.
Maybe he already has.
That wouldn’t be his fault, either.
Nothing ever is.
Once I thought she was finally free
But, she went back.
“Can’t help who you love,” I was told –
But it isn’t love.
It’s hate, insecurity, fear, and above all, control.
I hope it isn’t too late for her.
For all the hers out there
As they feed that bottomless pit of anger
They are living with –
It will never be filled
And it will never change what it is
But it is not love.
Silence is empty, but heavy on my stomach.
I bite back all the unsaid words
Even though I’ve said them before.
I quietly wait for her to wake up.
Come to me –
I will help you
I promise.
I do not want to hurt or judge you.
Just see you safe.
And to just see you happy,
To be loved as you are capable of loving.
I wait because you will never be alone.
I wait until you see what—we all do…
Not only is he watching
But I am, too.
The release date for “This Second Chance” has been moved to September. I apologize for the delay and thank you for your patience!
Next week I will share the reviews of books I’ve been reading! Plus, “Dolphin’s Cave” cover will be making its debut here!
In August, there will be the normal weekly blogs – plus, I will be hosting special edition blogs for my fellow authors of RWISA. If you are interested in finding some fabulous new authors to read, I invite you to check it out!
This will be the final chance to win the weekly blog Amazon Gift Card. Please leave a comment by 8-1 at 9:00 PST and you will be entered to win the gift card. I will update you on future opportunities soon!
Embrace your inner child, D.L. Finn
Powerful writing, D. L….I’m so looking forward to reading This Second Chance. September will be a celebration! ♥
Thanks, Gwen:) Your comments always mean a lot to me!
Wow. That hits you right in the gut. Watching a situation like that… it’s hard when they don’t want help or they go back to that situation. You hurt for them but all you can do is wait till they gather the strength to leave then help when they ask.
It does hurt to stand by and watch and not being able to do anything about it. Although, I’m glad I got to see the strong woman that emerged from it.
That was some amazing words, thank yoj
Thank you, Carolyn!